Episode 80 - Lobster Cove Head Lighthouse

0:00 We're ready. Anytime. Hi, everyone. I'm Emily. And I'm Vince. And this is The Lighthouse Lowdown. I tried to copy the way you said it before we started. The Lighthouse Lowdown. Oh, before. Yeah, you say it like a wrestling announcer. Just seems right. Whatever those are called. All right. It's going to be a... shorter episode today okay short episode a little one i i liked the name of the lighthouse so that's why i selected it but it didn't have like a whole lot of history around it so that's what happened nice i do have a history buoy and i should have looked at i should have looked at the patent for this one because i'm sure it would have had a better explanation for how this works but we are covering the sun valve for our history buoy oh i thought that was the lighthouse Sun valve lighthouse. That would be so cool. But no. So I kind of, I looked up, I wanted the history buoy to be, what do you do to a lighthouse in order to automate it?

1:12 And so it's actually not that easy to find like just an article or something written about that. So I had to just look at what people invented that started automating lighthouses. Well. So like, what do you mean? Because I would argue that there's been various levels of automation. Exactly. Well, that's what I mean is that I'm looking at now the beginning of automation. There was some, they did stuff before this, but like the real start of having automated lights is from this invention called the Sun Valve. Okay. By Gustav Dahlin. I'm just going to try to pronounce his name there. So. It is a large black metal rod surrounded by three polished metal rods.

2:03 And those are all enclosed in a glass tube. And so the concept is that the black rod in the center would absorb more heat than the others when the sun would rise and would therefore expand in the sunlight. And then this expansion would cut off the gas supply in the valve during the day. which in turn would switch the lighthouse off. That's awesome. I know. Cut off the gas flow, light turns off. That's incredible. And then after the sun would set, the black rod would cool down again and open the gas and thus turning the light on. So the gas, when it's available, is lit by a pilot light that's always burning.

2:43 So I think that was one of the things that was a struggle is that if the light, if the little flame went out, then there's no light. But it was pretty reliable. They used it for a lot of buoys. Of course, yeah. For some lighthouses. That's incredible. For those of you who are just listening, we're looking at an image that looks like a Martha Stewart pepper cracker. Oh. Something like super high tech. Is it pepper cracker? To me, this looks like a component that someone would steal in a future movie, like a futuristic movie that's imperative for some big. This is the combobulator. Come on. You see the combobulator is broken. Where is that from? There's a series of guys on TikTok that go and lowball people for cars. Oh, no. Yeah, it's kind of tragic.

3:32 I think one of them got arrested lately for something. I'm not sure. But one of the things they'd like, they'd introduce themselves. This guy's Tommy Tough Knuckles. You know, that's like how he'd introduce himself. And they get under the car and they're looking at, you know, various vehicles. And he'd say, oh, the convoy is busted. The owner's always kind of like. okay whatever like and then yeah because they're saying a bunch of stuff so anyways that's what i this looks like a compopulator i think i don't like people being punked like that no i'm uncomfortable watching when people are like just think they're having a normal interaction it's like what yeah they're trying to sell their corvette and there's some of these like 20 year olds show up yeah i think i just feel bad when people are confused that's why i'm i hate it oh no please stop Okay. So anyway, I wanted to say something. So it's a gas valve. So it opens and closes gas supply. Yes. And then the pilot light is separate, which is usually burning.

4:27 Yeah. I would, I would guess that this caused a lot of problems, not some problems, probably some explosions. Cause if you ever have, like I worked for a natural gas company for a little while, if you ever have a gas leak, that's not being burned, it can build up to an explosive level as you're probably aware of from work. They've got to have some control system. If this was going to be what they relied on, then they've got to have some way to control that it's not building up, but it's just stagnant until the valve is open. It'd be so scary. If it didn't turn on for the day and you see it from the ground, you have to go up and go in there and get the gas out. Do not create a spark. No static electricity.

5:10 Yeah, true. Well, speaking of explosions, Gustav won. the Nobel Prize for this invention in 1912. And he couldn't accept it in person because he was blinded by an explosion during experiments for like when using this type of gas. I can't remember what it's called. Damn. Like really light, like acetylene. Yeah. So at the end of his career, he was blinded, but he was still doing experiments and like invented a couple other things even. I think acetylene is white gas, if I remember right. We had these lanterns as kids when we went to go camping. There's two types of lanterns we had. One was the conventional, you know, shell lifts and closes. And the other, so that burns kerosene. And the other was, I think, was called white gas, and I think it was acetylene. Could be wrong on there. Many an effect check. But those would fill these, like, pouches with gas, and the pouches would ignite, and it was, like, white. It would burn super bright.

6:13 It was this super bright lantern. Yeah, powerful. Well, feel bad for Gustav. Yeah, he was all right. But he was there. He just wasn't, he couldn't see. They just said he couldn't pick up his ward in person. Damn. Also, 1912, I wonder if he was kind of like, people didn't want to see him because he was blind. Oh, no. That's terrible. That's what I'm saying. I know it was a bad time for anyone to have problems. Well, did they have a ceremony? I think they do for Nobel. Is that in Sweden? Is that where we, in Stockholm? That's interesting because... No, for those of you who are not here, which is everyone, the cat just jumped onto Emily. Just the one thigh, though, and then tried to balance so all the claws were out. I don't understand why you would do it to me. Okay, what I was going to say is that Gustav was Swedish, and so... Does that make sense?

7:09 Yeah. Swedish inventor. I can't help myself. He's looking it up. I'm looking at white gas. Oh. There's a couple things I didn't know. Yes, it is. Oh, good. Well, this is the fuel I was thinking of. Is it acetylene? Acetylene, turns out, is hard for me to spell. There's a Y in there. Okay, I got it wrong. It's not the same thing. Okay. I have to redact what I had said. Whatever. It's the same vibe. Sorry. And that was the cat jumping off. Ow! Look! Yep. Remember, you love these guys. Why would you jump off if you don't have secure legs? They're going to bleed. Yeah, so Emily's now bleeding out of her leg for this podcast and this cat. I would also just want everyone to know this is the cat that had its ACL repaired recently. Which, if you think about it, if you were to repair an ACL on a cat, you can't have that cat jump. Yeah.

8:06 And cats can't be trained or controlled. Or controlled. So we put that cat into a tent. A tent. In our house for eight weeks. It was like, I think the tent was maybe two weeks. Or maybe three. And then we had to take all the furniture out of our room. I was jumping somewhere else he shouldn't go. Bo, hey. He's good. It's fine. But just to close out the story, we had the cat in the tent in the house, and that required us moving all the things we had out of the bedroom, sleeping on the floor, I think for about eight weeks. So this cat is loved, and that pain you hear, that's love. That's just one of the prices you pay by owning a cat. I'll accept it. Permanent skin damage. Do you want something for that?

8:59 Do you want to take a pause? Yeah, maybe I should clean it. Let's clean it. We'll come back. All right. All right. I'm ready to go. Back in the game. Sorry. You're good. Looking at pictures of us yesterday at the wedding of our friend. Oh, yeah. So, picking out a couple of those. Are you going to post them? Yeah. Cute. You never post stuff. Yeah, I know. Never. No big deal. Kind of a big deal. So I got us, and the cat got us off track. But that was it. So we got our automatic valve Nobel, and his name was Gustav, and he was blind, and he didn't get his package. He didn't get his package. He wasn't there to receive his package, his reward in person. Yeah, but it wasn't like he was just a recluse after that. He kept inventing, which I just think is really crazy cool. It's good, too, because if you're going to go blind for some cause, it's nice to be recognized for. The breakthrough that you made. Well, I was just thinking his face isn't damaged. I saw a picture after the explosion.

10:01 That's why I thought it was correct. You were saying about the white, like it burns a bright white. Like if there was an explosion, it may be bright enough to blind you. That's what I was thinking. It could be pressure, though. Just a pressure wave. Yeah. My grandpa lost sight in one eye from a bullet that went by. He was in World War II. in service in world war ii so it didn't possibilities it did not hit him but yeah bullet came close enough to travel that it took his eye out so yeah anyways eyes are very also to know that a bullet went that close to your head i know and if it was probably two inches yeah three inches left or right then i wouldn't be here isn't that crazy this podcast yeah might not be the same would not be here Okay. History buoy closed. Very good. Thank you.

10:57 Next is our lighthouse. Episode 80. Episode 80. It's a big one. And we're going to be covering Lobster Cove Head Lighthouse. Lobster Cove Head Lighthouse. I kind of wish it was just called Lobster Cove Lighthouse, but I understand. Or Lobster Head. Lobster Head. Also would be an excellent name. So we're going to stay in Canada. I did Nova Scotia last episode. Two in a row. I know. So a little bit north of that is the island of Newfoundland. That's obviously I was looking around. Snooping around Canada. Yeah, when I was like, what else is up here after we did Peggy's Cove? And then I saw Lobster Cove and I was like, lobster? And that's how this happened. I've heard Newfoundland is just gorgeous.

11:46 I know a lot of Canada is, but. Well, this one's nestled in a national park. So there's like all kinds of good hiking and like fjords and stuff. I'm excited. Okay, so I'll pull up a picture of our location. You can see Nova Scotia down to the south. And then we have. That's Newfoundland. Well, it's Newfoundland and Labrador, and then the island itself is Newfoundland. Okay. So I got a little zoomed up part so you can see the area of the lighthouse that we're covering. Wow. So on the west side of this island, there's a tiny bay called, I want to say it's Bon Bay, which splits into two fjords, the east and the south arm. As you can see, one is east, one is south. And the east is super deep and surrounded by the national park that I was talking about, while the south is more shallow and small with Woody Point and some other small settlements.

12:44 Okay. In 1889, G .C. Fern, who was part of the legislative assembly for the district that included Lobster Cove, so just a position in the government, he shared concerns from his residents about needing a lighthouse in this area. At the time... A local fisherman was running a light in his own house. No way. Yeah. For the good of the fishermen. The residents each donated a pint of oil each week in order to fuel this light. So it was like this big community effort. Everybody was aware of needing a light because they were all contributing to one in somebody's house, which is just so funny. Fern thought the government should be supplying a light, obviously, at this point.

13:25 And he said, quote, a stately old dame has offered to keep the lighthouse free of salary. and said she, quote, you may be sure it will always be burning for I have three boys on the banks. That's nice. Yeah, she's like, I would do it for free if you would just get a light out here because all my sons are out on the water. I want to make it safe for them. What a nice old dame. I know. It's so funny that's how they said it. A stately old dame. She doesn't even require a pay. I know. She just needs a wall. For free. That same year, four new lighthouse locations were selected. along newfoundland's west coast including lobster cove head so legit he did a good job do you do you know did you think about uh i'm thinking i'm not knowing that fishermen stopped his light because there was this new one built i don't know now my little lantern's nothing well i'm sure he wasn't doing it for fun i don't know it also would be nice to take uh Kind of take the pressure off of having to have the only running light. Can you imagine how stressful it would be? And because that's not his only job. We're used to our light keepers. He's fishing as well.

14:34 Yeah, he's also fishing. The light keepers are. I guess, like, got to wake up in the middle of the night and make sure the light's burning. I wonder what kind of light he had. I don't know. Or if it was just, like, some makeshift, like, little thing. Something that used oil, though, right? It wasn't, like, a fire. Yeah. Wood fire. They picked lighthouse locations the same year that he brought up the issue, but it was another nine years before they had built all the necessary buildings for this lighthouse, which was like, oh my gosh, almost a decade. I mean, in lighthouse history, it's not that bad. In lighthouse construction, that's pretty bad. Construction is bad, yeah. They've been able to get stuff done within a year for sure. So this was just nine years is kind of crazy. But the lighthouse was lit in spring of 1898 and pulled up an old photo. We got a nice weather vane on top. It's a round iron tower painted white, and it was connected by a 20 -foot walkway to the keeper's dwelling, which was white and had black roof on the walkway and the keeper's cottage. And it had a fifth order lens that flashed every two and a half seconds. 26 feet tall. Very, um. That's only 26 feet tall? Mm -hmm. Wow. This image, I guess the image is from below. Yeah, the lighthouse is up on a rocky, like, outcropping. And I've

16:04 never seen, that's what I said wow about. I've never seen a staircase as the transport between the keeper's house and the tower. What's it called where it's protected? Walkway? Yeah. That's all I got. But I know what you're talking about. There's a name. It's a walkway built into the house. It's like a hallway that goes between the... I can't remember. Yeah, I know what you're saying. This one's got siding on it. The stairs is so interesting. Window. And it's cut out to match the shape of the rocks. That's really nice. Yeah, it's very unique. When they opened it, they also opened it as a signal station. So they had flags on a signal pole, and then each flag represented a letter of the alphabet or a phrase.

16:49 And so our listeners, if you want to know what we're talking about, episode 54, our history book, we cover nautical flags. Sure did. And what those mean. So it's actually really interesting. Pretty cool. Be fun to be able to communicate with just flags. Really cool. And that's what those masts are often for, right? It's like a mast on land. Yeah. I have an example. I have a picture coming up where you can see the flags. So this one I think is probably different. We're not in the U .S., so maybe it was more standardized in the U .S. But there's only three keepers total at this lighthouse. The first was Robert Lewis, and he served for five years until William Young took over in 1902. He and his wife Esther. Esther.

17:39 Esther. Esther, I would guess. It's a T -H. So I'm like, Esther. I don't know. In my head, I must have been thinking Esther. I'll just, it's fine. We're so sorry to Mrs. Young. They raised eight children at the lighthouse. Wow. And one of them, George, took over in 1941 until 1970. George and his dad both served like 39 years and 29 years. Yeah. It's kind of crazy. That's crazy. One family. Yeah. Little small town action over here. Because it's still, it's not like a booming area and you're still on an island.

18:23 So in a lot of cases in history, lighthouses that are on an island away from big cities, they don't, keepers don't last for really long stretches of time. Must have been more of a local mindset. Fishing focus, and then obviously they had some trade probably in that cove, that bay with Nova Scotia. I saw on the map Prince Edward Island, PEI, is up, it's northwest of, what is that? Oh, yeah, Nova Scotia. Yeah, but it's Prince Edward Island. I've heard lots of people, a couple people I know have physically gone there. They said it's just really stunning, that set of islands. Yeah, I feel like, I don't know enough about Newfoundland to say whether or not it's a thing people travel to. I'm trying to get a scale of how far that would be across the bay and how difficult it would be to travel. I mean, it looks like the distance is comparable to Maine. Yeah, cool part of the world. It looks like you may go there to this area for the national park.

19:29 If you're like a national park person. Yeah. What does that say? That national park name? Grossmorn. Okay. Grossmorn. I don't know. Lots of green up there. Oh, nice photo. There's where they would keep their signal flags. So it's just a flag post and they would raise and lower any communication, weather and such. This looks like a recent photo. It is. Yeah, this is what it looks like today. It's interesting because I didn't read anything about there being red trim around the keeper's house, and it has red trim. So, you know, in old pictures, it's hard to tell if it matches the black roof or if it's red.

20:10 Yeah, and we've seen a couple, but an all -white lighthouse is actually not that common. No, because they usually want it to stand out from clouds. I mean, you can even see in this picture from a distance, it would probably blend in pretty well. But it's on the highest point, I would guess, the local highest point. And they said it's 20 -something feet tall, less than 30. 26, yeah. Nothing crazy, but yeah, it is pretty high up there. 1969, the lighthouse was fit with automation equipment, and the light was eventually transferred to Parks Canada. So they are in charge of maintaining the light. Nice. Yeah. 1990, it became a recognized federal heritage building. Nowadays, the Keeper's House is a museum, which is open this year, May 16 to May 13. Oh, sorry, May 16 to October 13.

20:57 It's open 10 a .m. to 5 .30 every day. And there's also park rangers on site that will give you all the history of the lighthouse and the surrounding national park and all the people that live there. So I pulled up a picture of they have some stuff in the Keeper's House to make it look like when they were living there. And so you can like walk around and see what they used and they have like a bunch of exhibit stuff. And then you can see the entrance. There's a picture of the inside of the walkway to the front door of the tower. It's pretty cool. Kind of spooky. I'm not scared when I see this picture. It looks like you're going, it's like a door you should never enter.

21:40 I guess the end of it. So it's this stairway that's painted red. Like everything's red. Yeah. And it looks like they have some steps of what was required of the lighthouse keepers on there, which is kind of cool. Yeah. On the treads. But then, yeah, the top of it, I guess, is kind of ominous. Single bright light. Yeah. Right over the red door. Which is interesting because the lighthouse is white. They really embrace the red. I was going to say, I wonder when they painted that whole thing red. Well, and the floor of the house is red. Did you notice that? Yeah. Okay, so the trim must have been red to go with the theme. Yeah. Red was on sale. Yeah. But it looks really cool. I mean, you might as well do something different. It is really neat. A different space. That entry looks really heavy, heavy duty. So if there was some crazy storm, it could probably still be safe in the lighthouse itself. And then I just want to point out, I see a wood stove. Not a traditional wood stove like for heating, but for cooking. Yeah. That's really cool. My great -great... Let me think about that. Yeah, my great -grandparents, I guess.

22:47 When stoves used to be fancy, so now they have little claw feet and everything on them. Yeah, claw feet and a little window into the firebox. Yeah. Really neat. Pretty neat. I would love to visit. Looks awesome. Yeah, I feel like it would be a fun little stop. I wonder how you get to Newfoundland. Do they have a flight, or do you have to take a... ferry or a boat? I would guess you take a boat. They may have, I mean, everywhere has an airport for bush pilots and whatnot in Canada and Alaska, like the outer areas. But it might be big enough of an island that has a full -size airport. Newfoundland has several airports, including Gander International Airport. Hey, look at us. St. John's International Airport. Okay, so it's all kind. They're probably small flights. It looks like... I was thinking that Newfoundland would have one area where they have the most concentrated people. But the airports are completely, they're on every edge of Newfoundland.

23:51 Can you just look at one of them? They're probably not, you know, like Denver International. It's probably not going to be big. And this is a different part of the world, but just of interest. Like Alaska, we're talking to some people that have a house in view of Denali. And they were talking about a lot of the places in Alaska, you cannot reach them by road or by boat. You can only fly in. And so people, that's why bushcraft, small aircraft are so, bush planes are so popular up there. And I wonder if parts of Canada aren't the same. Yeah, I guess that would make sense.

24:32 If it's like densely, dense vegetation and everything, you wouldn't. Go through all the effort of putting in a road. It would actually be really difficult. But, you know, if you have a lighthouse, probably reach it by boat. Yeah. In the fjords. I should have put some pictures in here of the, like, what's the word I'm trying to think of? The local town? Just the nature, like, around there. Like, a picture of the fjord, not just a Google map. But we'll have to search it. Well, the Google map was awfully green. Green? And deep blue water. Very attractive. Good reason to visit this place, aside from the lighthouse. But that's Lobster Cove Head Lighthouse. Very nice. Just a little episode, little bite. Shortisode. Yeah, shortisode.

25:19 With our little break, we're sitting at just over 30 minutes right now. Oh, good. Yeah, I guess you'll be leaving next week for Sweden. And I'll expect a Swedish episode when you come back. Yeah, I gotta prepare. I'll probably have a shortisode as well. Okay. but uh i gotta figure out a recording too busy traveling too busy out seeing sweden world flying internationally you know how it is yeah flying flying into gutenberg uh something like that something like that um and then eventually flying home from stockholm okay so so but you guys are doing like a big you guys are driving okay South. So we're going to go. Start in Stockholm and end in Stockholm?

26:07 No, start in Gutenberg and end in Stockholm. Oh, yeah, okay. Yeah, so fly in there, go south. I wanted to, it's not, they're not doing tours. This is such a side note. But one of my other hobbies and interests is cars. And there's a manufacturer called Kuningsegg, which is in Sweden. Different pronunciations of that as well. Yeah, of course. Anyways, worth looking up if you're into cars. Starts with a K. But we're going to go south. We're going to go to the area. Oh, my gosh. The land of glass. So there's an area of Sweden that's known for glassworks and crystals. What? Yeah, like crystal cups, glasses. So I'm hoping to buy some glasses there and bring them home. That's so cool. I know. Oh, Emily's missing out. I love glass. If only we'd gotten married earlier. What? Then you'd go along. Oh, it's like permanent family only. It was spouses. I don't even know if spouses were included. It's a family heritage trip, so I should fill in everyone who's still listening. We're going to go see some of the people who are related to us in far distant past, some of the Swedes. That helped me with my blonde hair and tall height. Nice.

27:30 And then mom wants to show us some of the things that her mom showed her in Sweden that were important to my grandma. Her name was Gertrude by Trudy. Trudy Johnson. So anyways, half of my family was Swedish, and my mom wants to show us, me and my brother, some of that history and some of those places. Is your mom 100 % Swedish? she is okay yeah my mom's well you know american north america united states citizen right but like uh from her heritage was all swedish yeah because i told somebody at work this made me smile my mom's maiden name was johnson so trudy trudy's maiden name was uh swanson okay gertrude swanson yeah and i don't know before that but i think i remember If you go back, there's another Johnson in that family. Really? Or another Johnson Swanson. Like, you know, Johnsons, but they weren't related to these Johnsons or something. Yeah, of course. Or Swansons, I guess. And anyways, you take away what you want from that. But yeah, my dad's side didn't have any Swedish heritage.

28:46 So I'm a mixer. Yeah. But turned out tall and arrogant. Eric, I'm 50 % German. Yeah. My mom's 100 % German. Yeah. From, where'd she grow up? Bremen, Kansas. A lot of the, so I say that, a lot of the small towns in Kansas, again, fun fact for you who are not in Kansas, were settled by Germans and Volga Germans, which was, you can look that up too, but Volga with a V. They were, transient through Germany. So they had one generation in Germany from I think what was Prussia? Now I'm guessing. And then came to the U .S. and came west because it was open and they could do what they wanted. And there's whole communities like where I grew up, Hays, Kansas, where there's very few last names. There's a lot of shoemakers. There's a lot of Dinkles, Schmitz. There's like huge families. And now in modern culture, a lot of those people stay there. Like my good friends from high school, a lot of them still live there because they want to be around their family. So big family town, long history. And they think of themselves as German heritage. That's kind of up for debate, depending on who you ask. It's just one generation in history. Like, Volga Germans are not Germans, according to some other German heritage. Yeah, if you were, like, fully German, like, your ancestors

30:16 are from Germany, you'd probably have a problem with someone being like, I'm German. Who cares, you know? But if that's part of your life, like, we don't care, because... Yeah, we don't care. Well, maybe you should care because you're going on an international trip to meet your Swedish family. Yeah, my roots. Yeah, so you seem like you should care a little more. Well, about that, but you know what I mean. So for the Volga Germans, so if you go to Hayes, you can find in several stores this food called a birak, which is like sourdough or white bread, and it's filled with hamburger and cabbage or lettuce. And then, you know, you dip it in ketchup if you're me. And it's like a hot pocket, like a heritage hot pocket.

31:02 And everyone there would tell you, oh, these are German. They're from Germany. You know, sauerkraut and now cabbage and hamburger, you know. They're not from Germany. They're not in Germany. No one knows what that is. A beer rock is not the same thing in Germany. And it's not like the Americanized version of a hamburger versus Hamburg, Germany. It's a different. Wow, you have a lot. I mean, I grew up there. It was a whole thing. You have a lot of history. The high school used to make beer rocks by the hundreds and sell them as a fundraiser. So the high school, I think the cooks, you know, staff would volunteer to make hundreds of these things. They'd sell them packs of 12 frozen. Oh, my. Anyways, so we had a lot of beer rocks growing up. Harmless, just a little harmless fun. Yeah, a little crossover of culture. Yeah. I'm going to try to learn some of that when I go to Sweden. Excellent. I think we're meeting a lady named Monica. Oh. Who's a relative of mine, I think. And my mom told me another, a guy, he's too old to meet us now, but she met with him when she went there last.

32:08 And I want to say his name was like Oslo. Cool name. Oryx and something like that. Those were very different names you just said. I think there's a couple people in my mind. I was trying not to name the snowman from Frozen. What's his name? Oh, Olaf. Olaf. You know what? It could be. It could be. Oh. My mom mentioned. I have some vague memory of you actually saying that. I think that's the snowman from. Yeah. I think it is. So you can see as this example, my mind is not most accurate, but we do have fun. You got to check out the spreadsheet a little more. You got to get. on the spreadsheet. Absolutely. Okay, we'll wrap this up. We'll wrap this up. But we're going to Sweden. You're going to Sweden. I'm going to Sweden. And you have to bring me back gifts.

33:05 You can check out our podcast on thelighthouselowdown .com where you can watch our... YouTube videos and listen to our podcast and leave us a review. We love reviews. Haven't gotten one in over a year. Oh, come on. On our website, I think Spotify, we get more reviews, but I don't have Spotify, so I don't see those. If you want me to see that you left us a review, put it on the website. For the love of God, put it on the website. And we'll catch you next time on The Lighthouse Lowdown. Getting emotional. I just love it so much